Bullying hurts both, victim and attacker.

Being a bullying victim does increase the risk of psychosis. That’s not only the case for the victim but also for the ones attacking, as it’s pointed out in a study. I did go through a rough and intense time of being bullied when I was about 13 years old. It was the transition from elementary to high school that of course brought many changes with it. Due to an illness that forced me to stay three weeks in a hospital my start at school was delayed. It was already difficult enough to catch up. But worse, the teacher who was very ambitious for his students wanted us to do so much homework that I as a rather slow student just could not handle it. There was much underlying pressure in this class. In a nutshell, I became for some pupils the outlet for their anger. Being put under pressure by the teacher and being bullied led for the first time in my life to severe suicidal thoughts. Things began to take a different direction when I expressed this by showing a rope to my mother saying that I was going to hang myself. After a painful time, I was allowed to attend a different school, and I slowly began to fit into the new class. However, it was the onset of on and off suicidal thoughts; I kept having way over ten years, often on a daily basis. Yes, and I experienced several psychotic episodes in adulthood. Before reading the linked article below it never occurred to me that there may be a connection with being bullied.

Childhood Bullying Ups Risk of Psychosis as Adult

Indeed, I think this alone cannot be blamed for that I got mentally ill. But I recognize it as one of the causes. Therefore, I aim to raise awareness of this issue. It has taken me a long time to forgive the ones who bullied me or contributed to the situation. Since I’ve forgiven, I’m able to let go of the suppressed anger and allow the healing process to happen.

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